I worked on this painting for two sessions. The first session I started it with the yellow and the blue. I wasn’t really sure what I was doing-I was just listening to the leading of the Spirit through the music. The bottom part started out as ultramarine blue and when I put it on it didn’t “feel” right. Jonathan Dow was the worship leader that day and earlier that morning ( 5 am!) I had been reading about Hagar at the stream in Genesis 16:7- The Messenger of the Lord found her by a spring in the desert, the spring on the way to Shur.
Well, as I am painting the blue-which always represents Living Water for me- Jonathan starts talking about Hagar being by the stream and I started to cry because I had heard the right thing again. You see, earlier I had gone to the soaking prayer session at 8:30 and had already been feeling the presence of God there and I drew a sketch and just wrote down some words-what I was hearing in my prayers. Well that little sketch grew into a picture of a woman dancing with Jesus. Little did I know that my paintbrush and I would be dancing with Jesus during worship. I painted and I cried and J. sang and he began to sing about the blood of Jesus and I began to add the red paint to the dark blue which made this burgundy maroon color. When I got to the middle the color got deeper and my hand began to shake uncontrollably. It was shaking so violently that I had to put the brush down. What was going on inside of me is really unexplainable. I fell to my knees and then to my face and was a heap on the floor under the cross. I bawled my eyes out. God wanted me to surrender everything I had-including the paintbrush. I felt as if I had walked into the Father’s Heart through the paint. God had deepened my walk by mixing the paints on the canvas. He took me deeper into His heart. The paint was the blood of the covenant and the brush was me. I was undone. I can only imagine how Abraham felt. ( Genesis 15)
I couldn’t finish the painting that day. So I came back to it the next day. A woman in the congregation came to me and she said, “ I feel like that painting isn’t done.” She affirmed what I was feeling. Another woman came to me and said “ I saw you struggling with that painting and I want to pray for you….” I explained to her what had happened inside of me and she cried and was overwhelmed. Then she prayed with me.
This is the completed painting but there’s more to the story.
Listen to me- if you are an artist and you worship GOD with your art- keep doing it even if it feels weird. Ask God to show you what to paint, the colors, the shapes, the brushes-all of it. Surrender it all to HIM. I know worship leaders who do this too and as artists we worship with our brushes, colors and visions. It’s the same thing just a different tool. Put your heart in every piece and ask God to show it to someone and he will. He will also ask you to give it away and you will. Because when you give it away-you are giving GOD away because when you paint it is a gift for God-it is your worship. Share your heart with people an watch the HS change them from the inside out.
The Holy Spirit is descending on the painting, bringing the Living water and pulling us into the depths of the Father’s heart. Intimacy with the Father.
On the last day of our training we were able to give testimony. One man got up and said that he came there so he could have a more intimate walk with God. I instantly heard HS say, “ that painting belongs to him.” So after we were done I took him to the painting and explained it all to him and he had tears in his eyes. I told him I was gifting him with the painting and that every time he looked at it I wanted him to remember his walk with the Father- to go deeper, fuller, farther into His heart. He told me I was a blessing and I asked him to keep in touch because I truly care and I want to hear what happens after he gets back home. You see, I had given his wife- who is pastor- the Lion of Judah painting…but that’s another blog to come! This couple is going back home and will change the world where they live through everything they heard, saw and experienced at MSSM5. If you have never been involved with Aldersgate Renewal Ministries- I pray that you will. It has completely wrecked me for what is “normal.”